Wednesday, December 31, 2008

Sunbonnet Sue's more sophisticated sisters

There we were, sitting around the now defunct My Favorite Quilt Shop, admiring a baby blanket that had been brought in to be quilted on the long-arm. It was good-sized with many, tiny hand-stitched Beatrix Potter images on pure, pure white fabric. Just perfect for the precious little darling to barf on as it is not machine washable, it is not even dry-cleanable. Whomever attempts the hand washing will have a good party-time trying to keep all those silk embroidery flosses from running.

& that brought us to the question what does the quilting world need more of? The answer was obvious: porn.

The second part of this story actually belongs before the first. I loathe Sunbonnet Sue. Even well executed, the pattern just looks clunky to me. I know she is the darling of this, that & the other thing. I know she has a long & celebrated history. I know & I know & I do not care. I am with Lisa Boyer on this, the most interesting thing about her is what might be under that bonnet. Only one quilt pattern of hers (Sunbonnet Sue's, not Lisa Boyer's; I love Lisa Boyer's patterns) ever interested me, ever. It is on the Quilt Index right here. I had once toyed with a Sunbonnet Suicide quilt, but there surrounded by Beatrix Potter's wholesome goodness & the completely over the top efforts of a grandma-to-be the idea was born: Sunbonnet Sue's More Sophisticated Sisters.

As soon as the words were out of my mouth, M***** said "if you can get that in the local quilt show, I will give you $50". Some one call Mrs. G because I plan to collect.

Step one-acquire the images. Many lifetimes ago I was helping a public-sector-entity set up an internal organ (I just love that term-it means newsletter) & I ordered a quantity of clipart books from Dover. In error I was sent a completely inappropriate volume. I phoned them, they sent the right one out & never asked for the wrong one back.

Step two-remember I have the images. There was a need to teach a person how to digitize images for embroidery. I think. Maybe not. Anyhow, I remembered I had this clipart & A***** said she would like to embroider a particular one on her hand- towels. Something like that.

Step three-tidy the images for embroidery. For the last quilt show, I had scanned two 30's era quilts (yes, scanned the quilts, in my scanner, maybe a 6x6 block at a time, good sized quilts) to create line drawings of the embroidered images to sell at that quiltique. It was a monster of a project & hardly worth the effort EXCEPT I learned how to speed-clean a scanned image for embroidery. Also, I now have a slew of nursery rhyme figures & other random G-rated sketches for redwork embroidery in case I undergo a major personality change but retain my original hobbies.

Step four-taunt the world with my project while not actually moving forward. I think this step is self explanatory, really.

Step five-shut up & do the work. This is where I am now. I W*I*L*L be done in time for the TreeCity Show in May. I will submit it & I am dreadfully afraid that the organizers of the show know me well enough to hang it.

I think this just might be my only New Year's resolution.

4 comments:

  1. I look forward to the pictures!!

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  2. Did anything come of this? I've been looking for Sunbonnet Sue porn (as proof of Rule 34) and you seem like my best bet so far!

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  3. kinda- I cleaned up three images & prepped them for tracing to do embroidery & then never did the actual stitching. I would be more than happy to send the designs to you if you would leave an e-mail. They were taken from a DOVER clip art book Old Time Naughty French Illustrations (http://store.doverpublications.com/048699550x.html)

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